On May 7th 2020 I said goodbye to my Mum. I’d like to thank you for all your messages of love and support.
What can I say about my Mum? We had a bond like no other. She was the best Mum in the world.
There are no words to describe how much I’ll miss her. She touched everyone she met. She was that kind of soul, from her huge heart and wisdom, amazing food, the warmth of her hospitality and words, to her beautiful voice. She gave and gave and gave with not an ounce of wanting anything back. Throughout her 11 years of dementia, she lived her life as richly as she could. The true essence of her was always there. Each time we spoke she reminded me how blessed she felt. How lucky she was.
When I was called out to Aashna House after being told that they weren’t sure if Mum should go into hospital or not, I thought it best I go over. With everything going on, I didn’t want Mum in hospital if we could avoid it.
As I arrived, I could see she needed to go so we were waiting on an ambulance, but we didn’t know we’d lose her.
I spent half an hour with her. She listened to her favourite song, twice. When Will I See You Again, by The Three Degrees. She tried so hard to sing along. I relayed all her favourite relatives’ names and then, just after the paramedics arrived, and within a few seconds, she slipped away. Peacefully.
I feel so blessed to have been there. I feel like she was waiting for me before she left. She wasn’t aware that I’d held my Dad’s hand when he passed. She always felt Dad was alive. But she knew that I would have needed to be there with her. One of my deepest fears of sending Mum to Aashna was that I might not have been there for her, at the end. I’d told her that many times and she found a way. My Mum always found a way. I was allowed to hold her and tell her how much she was loved.
And for that, I feel like the luckiest person in the world. I feel like she was looking out for me, right till the end.
So in honour of our Mum, we have an even bigger job to do now. We will donate as many dolls and pets and help as many families living with dementia as we can. Mum’s memory will live on through the people we help, together. Thank-you for helping us make a difference.
